DC cherry blossoms are beautiful when the come into bloom in early spring and an absolutely lovely final image as your eyes sag from the two liters of bleach you ingested or from the 22mm hollowpoint just beginning to eviscerate your brainstem. There's no wrong way to do it as long as those gorgeous flowers are the sad coda to your life. Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion Follow Drew Cleary on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/troublehacker Follow Onion Digital Studios on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/oniondigstudios